Yesterday was a whirlwind. Our first night with an 8 1/2 year old, followed by a day full of paperwork, and riding in cabs, going from one office to another office, signing papers, red index finger prints instead of chops. Not to mention a restless night sharing a small double bed with a very active, moving-around 8 1/2 year old boy. Rolling over, shaking, rocking, turning upside down, sitting up on haunches and collapsing over... all while totally asleep and unconscious. Ok. All romantics of sleeping with him when we get home are OUT THE WINDOW. AIN'T GONNA BE HAPPENING!!! GOOD GRIEF! I need my sleep.
Anyway, during the day of running around, at one point, we had to go to the bank. They counted our money 3 times and inspected each one front and back before they converted it for us. And they used a machine! The level of "money guarding" was really unbelievable.
In the middle of all the paperwork, we managed to go to a mall (very different from Malls at home). They are buildings housing small shops, what would pass as Kiosks at home. Sort of the type you see at marathon expos, if you've ever been to one. Anyway, each kiosk has an owner, no bathroom, and you pay for what you buy at each one. And there are lots and lots of them.
We got swim trunks and goggles for JJ. The trunks were TINY and I was afraid that they would not fit - be too small. But when he tried them on, they were a little big. I think my right calf may have fit into the trunks. And yes, he is THAT SKINNY. In fact, you can count the ribs on the front and on the back. If he had had the distended belly from malnutrition and starvation, he would have looked just like those kids on the "Save the Children Commercials" where they show skeletal children who tug at your heart. Seriously. This is NOT an exaggeration. It was very off-putting to look at and I wondered if China really did care about the kids in the orphanage or if they were just holding them there for convenience.
Later at the hotel, JJ and Baba's first foray into the pool was hilarious. I took lots of pictures of that. At one point, I stopped long before the swimming stopped. I mean, let's get real. After so many pictures of him hanging deperately to a float and trying not to drown, it all looks the same. Right? Anyway, this is especially funny considering JJ bragged about how he liked to swim and he had done it before. Turns out that was a mild exaggerated. MILD being an understatement. And I had my Note to Self moment - uh... the kid sorta lies... maybe not lie but definitely came from La La World...
So back to our Paper Chase...
During the paper chase, we also had to go to the Children's Welfare Institute (the Orphanage) to pick something up. It is in the middle of the city but when you get there it's like another world. You have go off on a side road, then take a right and travel down along the highway and then the high way veers away, and on a giant corner lot is a high concrete fence, a rolling iron gate and a guard with a guard house. Talk about total invisibility in the middle of a bustling city. Talk about being shunted off to the side. As we approached, JJ was very excited and knew the neighborhood as we arrived. The grounds of the orphanage was broad and I noticed a building with a red wall, gold lettering and nothing else. Somewhere behind there is about 2000 children who were unwanted and wards of the Communist Government.
They wouldn't let us inside because of the H1N1 scare. So, we sat outside the fence while Lovely Lilly went to the guard at fence. He called into the Orphanage and Lovely Lilly came back and we sat in the car to wait. Lovely Lilly asked JJ if he wanted to go back to the orphanage. And he said, no, he wanted to go home to America. There. He made his choice. This was very good. But if you think about, he came from this Invisible Environment and then he is off to a hotel - a big one - with LOTS OF FOOD and LOTS OF PRESENTS from COMPLETE STRANGERS WHO SAY THEY LOVE YOU - And WE PAY FOR EVERYTHING with MORE MONEY THAN YOU THE ABILITY TO COMPREHEND... what choice would YOU make? And this is not a stupid kid. That is for sure.
I also had my Mean Mom Moment at the bank. He is so interested in helping. So much so, he got in the way. Everytime Lovely Lilly went the window, he was right there. When Joe was trying to sign paperwork, he was right there. If he had been a cat, he would have sat in the window of the teller and then plopped himself down right on top of the paperwork that Joe had to sign. Joseph was getting a little aggravated and I lost my patience. Especially since I had told JJ about 3 times to give them room and come to me. So I grabbed him by the arm, and literally pulled him over to me and said something in fast English about behaving, not needing your help, and getting in the way, and he isn't doing any good, and when I call him, he needs to come over asap, and when I ask him once he needs to obey asap, etc. And I finished off with "dong bu dong?" In other words, "do you understand?" And he said, "dong." (I understand.). Hmmm. Amazing how an Irritated Mom is a universal language! I don't know what he thought at that point but if he were smart, he should have started getting the idea that there were going to be boundaries.
But in general, he is very good. Very neat. Very helpful. And he is even teaching us Chinese. He slows down when he talks to us, is patient, repeats his sentences and helps us understand. There is also a lot of gesturing. Forget formal good Chinese grammar. Again, his lisp and speech issues are a problem for understanding. I felt like all the Chinese I took was a waste of time.
Another interesting moment was at the Marriage Registration Office where we had to sign more paperwork. The Social Worker, Teacher Yuan, and the woman in the office (she seemed to be higher ranking than the others in the office because she was closer to the head official - the guy who sat in the single office) had a raging argument. GOOD GOD!!! You never heard such screaming and yelling. Never cross an annoyed Chinese woman! I understood a little - it was precipitated by knowing where some paperwork is - which I had in my packet. Anyway, evidently there is some bad blood between them and we just sort of kept our heads down, our eyes low, and kept quiet! Never get between two angry Asian women! JJ just looked up, wide-eyed, at the whole thing. I don't think he has ever seen people, especially adults, yelling and screaming and fighting.
Everywhere we went, people said that JJ was so lucky. But our friend Daniel said it best when he said, he seems smart and active and alert and so we are lucky. This is very true.
That's about it for yesterday.
Today, we wait to hear about the certificate, the passport, etc, and more paperwork and the notary office. No idea. We just do as we are told.
Hopefully, we will meet up with some friends here. And we will look for a small hand held video game for him so that when Joseph and I are on the Blackberry, he can be like Mama and Baba and be on his video game. So far, he puts on his swim goggles when we put on our glasses. I think we have to get him some sunglasses.
And he loves the flashlight that Joseph brought with him. He has also figured out how to work Baba's little digital camera. He must have taken about 300 pictures. In fact he took a picture of him holding every little thing he had from the care package we sent and insisted on taking pictures of us. He is also a little ham and poser. Not sure how I feel about that. Too bad the battery died. LOL.
Anyway, I am definitely in observation mode.
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